A big decision is decided

 Following on from my previous blog I have come to a decision about my work. 

Being a teaching assistant is a very rewarding experience. You get to be part of many young children's lives. You get to influence them, teach them, be another adult in their life they can trust and be confident with. You get to laugh with them, play with them in many ways in a different way than their families. You do get school holidays off which is excellent and so convenient when you have children of your own. 

However, there are also downsides. On a basic level the amount of work involved and emotional investment does not get paid for properly in money. The average wage is between £18K and £23K according to gov.uk but I have never seen that much. I receive just over £16k. I cannot take annual leave during school time and so my family are fully restricted to holidays in term time. I know children should not be taken out of school, but it is not even an option for us with myself and my son locked into the system.

I mentioned the emotional toll. Children are amazing but they are also stubborn, ruse, gross, mean and violent. They come with a myriad of baggage and personality types. When difficult behaviour strikes it is hard to keep your cool. Why am I asking the same questions of the same people over and over again? Why do you think the rules don't apply to you? Why do you feel that you can just not do the work? Why are you so aggressive with other children? Why am I not backed up by SLT when I have been trying to get a child to do as they are told? It is exhausting.

When you have a child of your own you have the chance to shape them and have ultimate control over their behaviour management. At school, you do not have that chance. You are battling against other parents and their teachings, school policy and the stubbornness of the child you are dealing with. I knew a child who was told by their parent at collection from the door that because they didn't behave at school, they don't get to have an ice cream from the ice cream van. Literally 2 minutes later the child was walking back passed the classroom door with a massive ice cream in hand! Why say this stuff and then back down? It leaves your teachers with no-where to go. The child just learns that you don't mean what you say and there are no consequences. 

Difficult behaviour in schools is on the rise. Not just here but globally. Every day there are news reports, YouTube videos, TikToks etc about teachers and teaching assistants leaving the profession in their droves. Poor behaviour, no consequences and no back up from higher ups are major factors in this. There aren't many professions where you can be physically attacked by someone and then have no consequences for the attacker but the victim has to treat them kindly with compassion and face them day after day.

There are many many reasons why I struggled to make my choice but I have decided to leave my job. 

I love the school, I love the team I work with. I would work with any of them again any day of the week. But this is not enough to stop me feeling constantly angry with children, parents, the system, upper management decision making, the government for not providing the funding to make things better and give the resources that are actually needed. I am sad that my son doesn't get the best from me, it is being drained from me by children who don't care and parents who value their own time rather than education at home. I don't have the energy for it all. Not while my son is young. 

I may return to the work as I do like working with children, but I cannot continue as it stands. 

Until next time 

xx