Dealing with rejection

Rejection can come in many forms and from many places. I used to deal with rejection in a very internalised way. I failed. I am not good enough. What’s wrong with me? Why don’t they want me? Why wasn’t I chosen? 

But not anymore. I am choosing to think differently about rejection. 

I’m currently sitting in a coffee shop waiting for anyone to show up to the meet up I have arranged for local creatives. I had interest on Facebook and tickets were “purchased” (its a free event) from several people - but no-one is here. We are over an hour into a 2 hour meet up and every ticket is a no-show. 

If this was a couple of years ago I would have gone into the downward spiral of feeling like a failure. But not any more. I am using this opportunity. I’ve brought my laptop and my headphones, listening to the K-POP Demon Hunters soundtrack and getting on with writing a blog post instead. I’m utilising the time I would have spent on meeting others by benefitting myself. 

I am going to be a speaker at an event tomorrow night talking about the power of the word “No”. I am feeling the effects of others saying no to me today but I am choosing to accept it for what it is. Not an attack or negativity towards me. There could be hundreds of reasons why no-one is here. They decided something else was more important. They are introverts who are having difficulty leaving the house to meet strangers. The weather is just too bad today, its cold and wet. Unexpected pressures from some other part of their lives. Whatever the reason, I am still safe with a hot chocolate warming my tummy and I can use the time and energy in a different way to the one I had planned. 

When I started my YouTube Channel I opened myself up to rejection be that in lack of views, lack of likes and subscriptions, possible negative comments about what I was doing, my style etc. But I made a choice. If I am going to put myself out there I need to learn to deal with that. Of course I feel it when a video doesn’t get many views. It hurts. But like anyone else on this planet, I make choices. I choose what to see, how much of a video to watch, to swipe away or to engage. Anyone unsubscribing from the channel could just be dealing with their own “Life Admin” and tidying up the noise in their life to focus on what they want to see when they have time to sit down with YouTube. 

Time is precious and the one thing we can never guarantee or rely on. We each need to live our lives how we want to and saying no to things frees up time for more of the Yes we want in our lives. 

It feels hard when people say no to us, but my strategy now is to have some compassion as we have no idea why they are saying no at this moment. It doesn’t mean I am not worthy of someone else’s time, there may be another time when I will be just the thing they need. I just need to utilise the time differently and find a Yes that works for me. 

Until next time 

xx